Ah, Bridget Jones.
Yes like many other girls out there, I am a self-proclaimed 'fan' of Bridget Jones. Since I was so incredibly bored, I decided to take a shower, treat myself to a chocolate Drumstick and snuggle under the blanket to watch my 'when-I-am-lonely-and-feeling-out-of-it movie'. Ever since that January 1 2003, it's always been my anti-depressant therapy.
I think we can all relate to her in some way (apart from the drinking and the smoking and the odd mother). I am horrible at public speaking (except for seminars) and can be quite cynical when it comes to guys (come to think of it, I'm quite blunt). But my favourite part in the entire movie is when she makes her blue soup dinner with Mr. Darcy and a whole load of other gunk and she invites her friends over for her birthday. And when they made a toast to Bridget they said, "To Bridget who we love just as she is".
I just really like that part out of the whole movie... I really love how her friends are always there for her to give advice or when she just needed to talk about the idiotical Daniel Cleaver.
Oh well, it just makes me smile.. that line because it's about the acceptance of one despite differences in dress, appearance, beliefs, morals, interests...
I think I am who I am because I've realized that many of the people who surround me are all so logical and into the math/science/ecology stuff so I try to become more of the artsy, almost 'ditzy' prototype.. which is not really good because now I don't know what people think of me. Fine, I do love shopping but I am not like Becky.
Today I sat alone at lunch. Initially she was sitting next to me, and then decided to move to another table where it was all guys. And I felt slightly hurt because I've realized how many of the crew have this preference to sit with males over their girl friends. And I hate it. Well I got called to sit over there later... no wait.. I was told to sit in the next table because the table was already full of guys. Well they were so incredibly loud, I decided to just leave the library because I couldn't concentrate.
Which is now why i want to leave high school. Many people say they don't think the crew has split up. I think it has. Just look at it. Look who is going together. Look who is not sitting at our table.
I hate how people are so Machiavellian (well I am too). Machiavelli believed that humans were evil and that we would exploit each other in the name of self- interest (yes I learned this all in politics.. it's really interesting.. I've realized how corrupt the United States is.. did you know they made this law that allows them to invade any country?!). Yes so he msgs me last night "Oh sam can you go to the library tomorrow... I don't have any notes.. can I study from yours.. can you send me your notes like you did last time'. I told him 'you only msg me right before a test'. He answered 'yes I know, I feel really bad'. I was thinking, no you darn aren't. You just want to use me to get ahead. It's true. You ask people for their study notes to improve and to get high marks.. or at least higher than your peers. I've realized that your mark alone doesn't matter. An 80% alone is good. It's only when you compare it with others, those who get 90%, does a 90% look more satisfying and an 80% looks like a failure.
And then he laughs at me today for studying from MY notes from our previous test and gets a higher mark than me. And don't say it's because he's joking. I'm so sick of these so-called jokes. Especially when it's on marks. He said "oh look, sam was studying so hard but I studied for only a little and got higher than her." Thanks a lot. You can make your own notes. okay I know guys make jokes and expect girls to be not as sensitive. But there's a fine line between jokes and seriously offending someone. I know I'm more sensitive than the average girl (then again I wouldn't start sticking my finger down my throat if you told me I was fat) but there is only so much I can tolerate despite how hard I try to not be as sensitive. But my sensitivity helps me.. it helps me see the world in a better light. It helps me to appreciate the things many people wouldn't. I love examining the texture of a flower.. that frosty translucent shimmer. I love gazing at the sheets of grass in the morning light as it shines in all its vibrancy, sparkling dew that winks in the sun. Glisten, glitter and fade away...
Isn't that like a lot of our lives? We glisten, quickly sparkle and then fade away.. we work to become big, get our moment of fame, and then quietly die off.
Yes like many other girls out there, I am a self-proclaimed 'fan' of Bridget Jones. Since I was so incredibly bored, I decided to take a shower, treat myself to a chocolate Drumstick and snuggle under the blanket to watch my 'when-I-am-lonely-and-feeling-out-of-it movie'. Ever since that January 1 2003, it's always been my anti-depressant therapy.
I think we can all relate to her in some way (apart from the drinking and the smoking and the odd mother). I am horrible at public speaking (except for seminars) and can be quite cynical when it comes to guys (come to think of it, I'm quite blunt). But my favourite part in the entire movie is when she makes her blue soup dinner with Mr. Darcy and a whole load of other gunk and she invites her friends over for her birthday. And when they made a toast to Bridget they said, "To Bridget who we love just as she is".
I just really like that part out of the whole movie... I really love how her friends are always there for her to give advice or when she just needed to talk about the idiotical Daniel Cleaver.
Oh well, it just makes me smile.. that line because it's about the acceptance of one despite differences in dress, appearance, beliefs, morals, interests...
I think I am who I am because I've realized that many of the people who surround me are all so logical and into the math/science/ecology stuff so I try to become more of the artsy, almost 'ditzy' prototype.. which is not really good because now I don't know what people think of me. Fine, I do love shopping but I am not like Becky.
Today I sat alone at lunch. Initially she was sitting next to me, and then decided to move to another table where it was all guys. And I felt slightly hurt because I've realized how many of the crew have this preference to sit with males over their girl friends. And I hate it. Well I got called to sit over there later... no wait.. I was told to sit in the next table because the table was already full of guys. Well they were so incredibly loud, I decided to just leave the library because I couldn't concentrate.
Which is now why i want to leave high school. Many people say they don't think the crew has split up. I think it has. Just look at it. Look who is going together. Look who is not sitting at our table.
I hate how people are so Machiavellian (well I am too). Machiavelli believed that humans were evil and that we would exploit each other in the name of self- interest (yes I learned this all in politics.. it's really interesting.. I've realized how corrupt the United States is.. did you know they made this law that allows them to invade any country?!). Yes so he msgs me last night "Oh sam can you go to the library tomorrow... I don't have any notes.. can I study from yours.. can you send me your notes like you did last time'. I told him 'you only msg me right before a test'. He answered 'yes I know, I feel really bad'. I was thinking, no you darn aren't. You just want to use me to get ahead. It's true. You ask people for their study notes to improve and to get high marks.. or at least higher than your peers. I've realized that your mark alone doesn't matter. An 80% alone is good. It's only when you compare it with others, those who get 90%, does a 90% look more satisfying and an 80% looks like a failure.
And then he laughs at me today for studying from MY notes from our previous test and gets a higher mark than me. And don't say it's because he's joking. I'm so sick of these so-called jokes. Especially when it's on marks. He said "oh look, sam was studying so hard but I studied for only a little and got higher than her." Thanks a lot. You can make your own notes. okay I know guys make jokes and expect girls to be not as sensitive. But there's a fine line between jokes and seriously offending someone. I know I'm more sensitive than the average girl (then again I wouldn't start sticking my finger down my throat if you told me I was fat) but there is only so much I can tolerate despite how hard I try to not be as sensitive. But my sensitivity helps me.. it helps me see the world in a better light. It helps me to appreciate the things many people wouldn't. I love examining the texture of a flower.. that frosty translucent shimmer. I love gazing at the sheets of grass in the morning light as it shines in all its vibrancy, sparkling dew that winks in the sun. Glisten, glitter and fade away...
Isn't that like a lot of our lives? We glisten, quickly sparkle and then fade away.. we work to become big, get our moment of fame, and then quietly die off.
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