Turn it Up!// The 'Paradoxic' Life

Macro shots are my friend

Omg, it's May 1. 11 more days. Goodbye, April. Hello, May.

I hate it when people blog to garner attention. It's like Facebook. I'm guilty for employing such tactics which is probably why I hate it when friends do it too. But in essence, I love blogging because 1. I learn best through introspective thinking and this helps me to flesh out ideas 2. I like writing.
An indicator of those attention seekers often come from sporadic/few entries and those who display their urls prominently on their msn/facebook name. Maybe I'm totally wrong but that's what I've noticed. Consistent blogs with an extensive archive are rare these days.
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Turn it Up!

I've started deviating away from hip hop for now, putting this aside for a new interest in lounge music as well as British rock and roll. My music tastes change rapidly according to the people and places in my life; it's a dangerous road and I hate to say it but it does become a thread that holds relationships together. Anyway, to the music I'm currently plugged into:

Brit Rock
-The sexiest song with an awesome blend of electric, drums and keys: Muse// Map of the Problematique.
This is quite different from what I normally listen to- the vocals are not to of my taste- it's rather pulled out and monotone but the instrumentals make up for what I dislike. If you don't really want to listen to the entire piece, just listen to the intro and from 4:10 where they start jamming. It's the sexiest thing ever especially on your earphones.

-Accompanying that is Muse's Supermassive Black Hole. The intro is yet again super sexy.


Lounge
-So I've started looking around at bars in the Meatpacking District to go to to have a celebratory drink with some level of alcohol content. I came across the Buddha Bar and like most club/lounge/bar websites, it includes a music playlist. I've become really hooked on music that has a synthesis of traditional Chinese instruments with the new hip hop/beats/techno.
The first on the playlist has hints of 'Parisian-ness' with the accordian: Bliss- Breathe. Very chill.

The following song on the list is called My Phuong Nguyen - Huong Viêtnam.
It serves as great background music for when I'm trying to work. Then again I work to pretty much anything that sounds good.

I also found another group called The Shanghai Restoration Project which mixes hip hop beats with Chinese instruments. It's not the most amazing, creative music; it rather lacks in creating variations and original mixes as well as the vocals are rather 'asian' (as in the lyrics make no sense or have nothing to do with anything.. but it's forgivable since I consider this more lounge/atmospheric music unlike Chinese/Japanese pop).
-Babylon of the Orient: it's all repetition but it's catchy.

Another one from the Shanghai Restoration Project: Miss Shanghai.
Actually my friend heard the song on the Buddakan website and I refered her to the artists.

Okay that's enough music for today.
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Starting from yesterday, life was and is going to be crazy. From having class 9-3 which included a presentation on my potential senior thesis projects (as usual I spoke way too fast... except I don't notice it until people tell me) to listening to drums at a studio uptown to Small Groups to prepping for Senior Night this Friday to coming home to greet my friend who flew in from Toronto to baking pink champagne cupcakes (they didn't card me when I bought a bottle!) to writing a crappy response paper.

I'm not complaining. I like a busy life. It makes me forget a lot of things I don't want to think about. Ironically, having a schedule and plans makes me feel rather free; free from people.
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Small Groups ended yesterday. It didn't hit me that I'd miss my tiny Small Group of five until now. At the beginning of the semester I wrote that I was becoming increasingly frustrated with the relationships within the fellowship which were not progressing anywhere. Though we were mid semester through, I saw the guards slowly starting to crumble, and looking at these friendships now I've realized how fond I am of them.
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The 'Paradoxic' Life

"It's obvious that you are passionate about your subject. It shows through in the way you talk."
It was the first thing my teacher said to me yesterday when I wrapped up my thesis proposal. Friends have told me they loved how driven I am towards a certain goal. I guess I'm lucky that I know what I want to do in life careerwise and have recognized my passion already. At times I wonder if God let me know relatively early on because it's going to be one hell of a ride realizing all these goals of mine that I might be 80 years old before I can run my own store. I'm driven, yes, but I'm also really scared. Questions like: "who will financially support my business?" or "how do I even launch a project this size?" are always popping up. On one hand although I understand the field of study I am passionate about realizing, I have no idea how to do anything. I just have a bunch of ideas I'd love to take for a spin. I've noticed that when I start talking about my major, my voice gets higher, louder and I start talking extremely fast. lol.

The past Sunday I went to a Sustainability Expo where I sadly saw a lot of greenwashing. Greenwashing is basically a product that just appears to be environmentally friendly but really is not. Along with my fashion designer friend, we started a mini debate with one of the store vendors who took 100% cotton garments and recycled them by adding in POLYESTER (why?!?!) to create new clothes. When I asked "what happens to the garments if I want throw them away?" The man said "why would you want to throw away our jacket?" In my head I was thinking "first it's ugly, secondly not everyone wants to keep a jacket until it disintegrates from too much wear. And why would you mix polyester in with cotton when it can't be recycled again?!"
I've noticed that one of the greatest vices a designer has is to actually test out their product for fear of it actually failing and not going according to concept. It's the reason why computers suck so much these days. Rawr.

I've realized that sustainability does not lie in products. If you focus on making green products, you still end up with a product that has no purpose other than to just take up space. Rather the key to sustainability is within a service system. Design a service where products can be recycled into an infinite number of times and the consumer does not own anything, he just borrows. That's where sustainability should be headed- not into more products which are purchased. Why? Because they can be always replaced by another green product. Now if you design a system in which borrowing- the company maintains the way the products are utilized and taken back. So instead of designing a book, design a library. Instead of designing a dress, design a method of a lend-borrow clothing library.
There's nothing like moving out of a house, that makes you realize how much unnecessary crap you own.

The reason why I love fashion and sustainability together is because sustainability is deeply rooted in philosophy. The way we design and make things all stem from different worldviews and ideologies and I love how my sustainability professor ties in philosophical ideas with the design of products.

You see, I'm not interested in saving a polar bear. If anything I won't really be affected by global warming first. It'll probably be some family in Sri Lanka who I'll probably never meet be affected first. I, on the other hand, have a pretty good chance at surviving any environmental crisis. It is not to say that I am totally untouchable. What I am trying to say is that I am interested in design that drives sustainability through our artificial urban environments. Planting trees is nice but I'll save that for the hippies and other Waterloo kids.
I've had the privilege of growing up in both a suburb and a city that most people I know never had, thus I have experience from both that creates a perfect synthesis of nature.vs artifice. I love the city: I love it because it's fast paced, it's bubbling with energy, it's full of ideas and design, it's full of people and things to do. The suburbs on the other hand, are quiet tree-lined villas that are nice for temporary retreats. But in terms of sustainability, although most of my Toronto friends probably see more trees and grass than I do in five years, the suburbs are the death of the environment. New York is known to be the most energy efficient city in the States because its high density population results in the need for public transportation and small living spaces. It's great.
Anyway, I'm rambling. The point is is that I want to design for the city life, and NOT for the treehugger in its most literal form.

I'm beginning to see why God lead me down this path that's barely been set foot on. I love it: it sets me apart from the rest, gives me the ability to serve others and collaborate with designers as well as satisfies me in terms of the need for beautiful objects that are always changing. I am both the consumer and producer. I am both the suburban dweller and the cosmopolitan girl. I am both a treehugger and a fashionista (ew I hate that word). My life is full of paradoxes.

Overarching arcs of flowers