Picking Up the Pieces of the Past// Thriving on a State of Anticipation

Puaha. Sorry I had to post up the $72 box of sashimi and sushi we had. It was great.

Hm so this is my review of the new Linkin Park cd. I bought it the day it came out- nice cover.
It's a lot more mainstream sounding than what I'm used to.
They've definitely grown up- gotten less about the self and more political and serious. Yet some of the songs like 'Bleed it Out' has this really happy vibe- almost teenybopper- sound to it. I don't like it that much right now because it sounds like any other band out there. What I loved about their old tracks was the strong catchy beat with the sound mixing. It was more cool and I'm finding this new cd more warm- if that makes any sense. I guess this one is more lyrical (like Shadow of the Day) and less rapping/screaming.
My favourite cd, hands down, is Reanimation. I think that's perhaps because I heard that before the cd prior to that which it was based off of but I loved every song on that cd. I still listen to 'By_Myslf', 'Krwling', 'My December' and 'Wth>You'- all songs I love because they sound so different from most bands either for its beat or for the instruments they included in it.
Ok, another thing, is the swearing. Sorry, it just ruins it. Wasn't Linkin Park known for not using swearing to express and convey emotions?

So far the songs I like are 'What I've Done' and 'Hands Held High'- the former grew on me and the latter for the violins. It sounds like autumn- like a black lamp post lined street smattered in ruby red and gold leaves.
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So what was supposed to be a 1.5 hour flight turned into a minimum of 2.5 hours of sleeping and waiting inside the airplane on the runway waiting for the thunderstorms to pass by.

I'm back. It feels odd. It feels like it should be January when I left. But it's not. It feels strange to walk into my room and inhale the air in our house- it smells faintly of my mom's potpourri mixed in with the unexplainable.
There are times when I hate memories- and I try not trigger them by destroying or hiding any objects that I know will bring back memories. Anything with dates goes: movie tickets, bills etc. I hate returning to a room that's dated- like I'm supposed to slip back into a dirty suit. It's like trying to pick up the pieces of a life on hiatus but not quite being able to fit them together perfectly.
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There are so many good things to come in the next two weeks yet I don't want them to come because I love being in the state of anticipation. Anticipation, to me, is that of hope and a mixture of the excitement looking at an object/event at its most subjective ideal. So when the pleasure ceases- when the event ends- disappointment ensues. Though the anticipation has been satisfied, a sense of wistfulness comes about. So with all these good things about to come, I don't want them to be fulfilled for the fear of just approaching the end. And then what?